Holding Steady
Uranda September 9, 1948
Blessed ones, holding steady when
the human vision cannot see the way, holding steady through that last phase of
the cycle that permits fulfilment, is so vitally important. The world is full
of those who begin things. Multitudes have started to do very marvelous things,
and those beginnings are often with much fanfare and display; but beginning
something, while it may be necessary and important in its place, is of little
avail if we do not finish it. The Master said, "I have finished the work
which thou gavest me to do." God is a finisher of things. If we are to
complete our work, if we are to fully perform our task, we must let God's will
be done through the completing phases of each cycle, so that the energies that
have been expended shall not be dissipated, so that that which is builded shall
not come to naught, so that that which is done may carry through to glorious
success. Only through God's power, only through God's love, only through
obedience to God's will, can these things be, and only as we let go in the
spirit of the Christ, only as we allow the outpouring of the Holy Spirit, and
only as we let the fire of love cleanse and purify and make whole, according to
the pattern of truth, can we know what it is to be received of the Lord in that
full adoption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.
Each one, individually, works
through cycles of development and fulfilment and outworking. Each one here has
at some time—and I can safely say many times—passed through an abyss of
nothingness. That abyss of nothingness, that seems so empty of all fulfilment,
is always, until one reaches a certain level of consciousness and being, a
prelude to fulfilment. I have so often, in time past, given the assurance that
the individual who comes to the abyss of nothingness is coming to the door of
fulfilment. When the individual begins to feel that abyss of nothingness he
should know that he is being prepared, if he will but hold steady, to be born
into a new and higher level of life. Each one of you has passed through such an
abyss more than once, but the human tendency is to still get disturbed when
that abyss appears. When one is leaving an old level of life behind, and before
one has found himself in a new level of life, it seems to the human mind that
there is nothing; but he who holds steady, centered in God's love, maintaining
correct polarity, finds that he passes through the abyss of nothingness and
comes forth into a new and higher level of life, just as the babe comes forth
from the womb.
I would that I could establish in
each one's consciousness the fact that there is nothing wrong with the fact
that you have the experience of passing through an abyss of nothingness. The
fact that you come to an abyss of nothingness is not cause for discouragement;
it is not cause for being upset or bothered in any fashion or way whatsoever.
The fact that you come to an abyss of nothingness is proof that you are growing
and that, if you hold steady in the completing phases of the cycle, you will
come out of that abyss onto a higher tableland than you have known before. I am
not suggesting that you should try to look for, or find, or get into, an abyss
of nothingness; for if you do, that is of no value. But when one comes to the
abyss of nothingness in the cycles of his being in the movement forward, it is
proof of progress. So often I hear the expression: "There must be
something wrong with me. I must be failing somehow. Things are not right in some
fashion or I would not have this abyss of nothingness. I would not feel this
loneliness, this utter separateness from things." You know, each one, what
it is. Each one is also inclined to feel that no one else has such experiences.
Each one imagines, if he lets the unreal mind work, that he alone has to suffer
so, that he or she alone has to pass through such things, and that for everyone
else it is easy, or that there is no abyss of nothingness. But you know
individually, and I know with respect to you collectively, that there has not
been a single one of you reach this point without passing through the abyss of
nothingness, and I wish to assure you again that when you come naturally to
that time in your progress it is proof that you are moving forward in the way.
When you are passing through the
abyss of nothingness it seems that you are alone. Those who have attained to
high illumination back through the ages have said that that is one place which
you must traverse alone—utterly and absolutely alone. Now I must point out that
that statement is not true, but I must also point out that it always seems to
be true to the individual. As far as the individual himself is aware, he thinks
that he is alone. He cannot see the fact that he is not alone. As you move forward
and reach a higher point of consciousness you come to know that it is not
actually an abyss of nothingness. Do you think that I have fulfilled my
ministry these years that I have worked with and among you without passing
through that which is, at certain levels of development, called an abyss of
nothingness? I have passed through those cycles not a few times only, but
scores of times. In years gone by it was to me also an abyss of nothingness. No
one reaches that higher level of consciousness without passing through what is
to him an abyss of nothingness, and it must be several times. Every movement
from one level of consciousness to another requires that you pass through what
is called an abyss of nothingness.
Finally you reach a point where
you know it for what it is, and it is not an abyss to you but it is a point or
phase of the cycles that seems to be peculiarly formless. Sometimes little
steps or movements upward are experienced, where the abyss of nothingness may
last only a few moments or an hour or two and it passes away. Those may relate
to little steps of progress; but in the larger cycles, where the true
outworking is appearing, there come the big gulfs, as it were. It seems as a
huge abyss of nothingness, and the individual feels that he is alone, utterly
alone. He cannot even see or feel or recognize that I am with him in spirit. He
cannot see how it is that the Lord is with him. He cannot see how it is that
his brothers and sisters are with him and have shared that experience in
aloneness. So he is inclined to begin to look down instead of up. But if the
individual always remembers, when he comes to the abyss of nothingness, so
called, to look up and hold steady, in season he will begin to see a light as
it were, and the light will grow and the darkness will be dispelled as he draws
nearer, and shortly he will find himself on a higher plane of being than he has
ever known before.
On the higher levels it becomes
simply the Sabbath rest of the cycle, but that completing portion of the cycle
is always formless. It is easy enough for some human beings to hold steady in
the beginning of the thing, working it out toward the culmination, but when
they come to that formless period, where it means simply holding steady on the
vibration regardless of anything else, they tend to spoil all the things they
built before. Blessed ones, whether it is for you an abyss of nothingness or a
Sabbath rest in the Lord, know this: you must pass through these cycles to find
yourself moving toward higher land in the kingdom. You can no more escape it
than you can simply cut one day of the week out of the cycle and escape it. It
is there. You have to live through every day whether you like it or not, so let
us like it, let us praise God for it, and let us let that seventh day, that
abyss of nothingness, be a time of attunement in God, so that when we come
through we can look back without regret and praise God for the assurance
fulfilled. All things work together to perfection for those who love and serve
the Lord. It is not through self-centeredness, not through selfishness, not
through trying to get something for ourselves, even if it be love or
companionship or anything else, it is by loving God, and holding steady in the
cycle of fulfilment, that we come to fulfilment and know what it is to grow in
grace and in the stature of Christ Jesus.
Blessed ones, our Master went
through many such cycles when He was on earth. I have spoken of His garden of
Gethsemane, but there were many periods when He had to pass through that abyss
of nothingness, when He went apart into the mountain alone to pray. And if you
think I have not had many such periods, you do not know what the facts are. If
you think there is anyone here who has made any progress at all who has not
passed through the abyss of nothingness and known periods of aloneness—whether
the individual be married, single or anything else—if you think such a thing,
you do not know the truth of the matter. It is not a matter of whether the
individual is married or not. The married ones get just as lonely and feel just
as alone as the single ones when they get into the abyss of nothingness. I have
sought to tell you that before, but for goodness' sake, listen to my word
tonight and remember it, and stop rebelling against the necessities of passing
through the abyss of nothingness.
When one is in that abyss there is
no cause to be bothered, no cause to be disturbed about anything under the sun.
Hold steady in the Lord and let Him do the works. He will carry you to that
higher level and you will learn to be at home there, and then, as soon as you
have reached a point of feeling at home at the new level, you will have to
leave it. It will be broken up, it will change, and you will move through
another abyss of nothingness to a still higher level. And every time the human
mind thinks it is all worked out and that it will be thus and thus and thus,
then it will be broken up; for to stay in such a state would be to stagnate and
die. No, blessed ones, as soon as you begin to feel at home at any level of
consciousness, if you are truly moving, progressing, you will come to another
abyss of nothingness. Some of them will be small, some of them will be large
and long according to the human concept, but it does not make any difference
whether they last a few moments or a few months. They do not have to last a few
months, but I have had them last far longer than that myself. But it makes no
difference. Hold steady and let it work. I remember a period of some months
just before, and just after, the Lord provided Sunrise Ranch for us, when I had
to go through a long abyss of nothingness. It was not just for a few days or a
few weeks; it was over a year. I was criticized by various ones. Some thought I
was not doing everything I should or could, and some thought this and some
thought that, and there was pushing and pulling and criticisms of every sort,
and I had to live in high disdain of the whole disturbed state, without
anything but aloneness in that, and hold steady. And if I had not done so we
would not be here tonight. I am not saying that to take credit to myself. I am
saying it to emphasize to you that if you are going to have any fulfilment you
are going to pass through the abyss of nothingness. You cannot have fulfilment
without it.
I have pointed this out before. It
is in my writings, and I have taught you, but it has not been realized deeply
enough. We are coming to a time when there must be a greater outpouring of the
Holy Spirit. That means that when you touch your abyss of nothingness you must
function just as if it did not exist. If you are bothered or disturbed you are
going to shut off the current and—but let us not talk about that. When you hold
steady in the abyss of nothingness, undisturbed, tranquil and serene, no matter
how lonely you feel, you will come to know that companionship in the abyss of
nothingness is impossible. So often there are complaints from those who do not
have husbands or wives: "Oh, if I just had a companion like you, or
someone else, then I would not feel this terrible loneliness." And if I
undertake to tell them they do not know what they are talking about, they look
at me askance and say, "How can you talk like that?" If you want to
be convinced, I will ask every married man and woman to stand if they agree
with me, and I do not think any one of them would remain sitting. I do not care
if you have a husband or wife, or how much you love your husband or wife, when
you come to the abyss of nothingness you have to take it alone and hold steady
and let it work.
Blessed ones, hearken to my word
and let it sink in deep. You will save yourselves much misery, you will let the
thing speed up tremendously, and you will make it much easier for me, because
then, when I speak to you concerning these things, you will not come back with
the old idea of the outer mind, "Nobody understands; even Uranda doesn't
seem to understand my particular situation. He may understand somebody else;
but me! I am peculiar, I am different; he does not seem to understand me."
The point is that as long as you have any such idea you do not understand
yourself. So, blessed ones, if we are to have that glorious outpouring of the
Holy Spirit for which we have prayed and longed, if we are going to have that
fulfilment as members of the Christ body, we cannot hope to avoid our cycles in
the abyss of nothingness, and we would not if we could, because at this level,
while it may be an abyss of nothingness, as you get higher it will be the same
thing seen in a different light and you will call it the seventh day of rest.
© Emissaries of Divine Light
