“I Love You, Lord"

Martin Cecil   November 7, 1971

The Lord has called to the children of men all down through the ages, not necessarily in the spoken word, although that has been used; nevertheless this word has been conveyed to the children of men in their own individual and collective experience.  It calls to human beings to come back, to relinquish the state of separateness and return to the Lord in oneness. Even though this word has been expressed to all generations in the current of the spirit of a heart of yearning, thus far the children of men have resisted it. It has seemed that they have preferred to continue a little longer in their state of separateness. In effect each generation has been inclined to say, “Give me a little time to enjoy this state.  If it becomes too bad I will consider turning to the Lord later.” But invariably later has been found to be too late. “Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth” — before it's too late.

There is a reason why human beings have been so reluctant to come again to the Lord, even though He does come walking in His Garden in the cool of the day in every generation. Most are inclined to look upon that occasion as having occurred once long ago, but in effect the Lord has come in every generation to walk in His Garden and to speak the words, “Where art thou?” As it was on that first occasion, man has hidden himself from the Lord because he was afraid, knowing himself to be naked, knowing himself to be vulnerable, knowing himself to be alone, separate from God. This state of human experience came because of man's own decision and choice, and it brought in its season devastating results of various sorts. Some of these results were indeed of a catastrophic nature, so immensely destructive that only a few human beings survived on the face of the earth. Obviously we are the children of those few human beings. This heredity is our heredity.

If there is some very devastating and violent experience in the individual life there is a tendency, in self-protection, to bury the memory of that experience, to hide it away from recall. Even though it is hidden and covered up, it is still present. There is much buried in the lower levels of consciousness in man, both from the standpoint of individual experience and from the standpoint of what might be called race experience. There is a record contained in the very consciousness of the earth itself, of the substance of the earth, of all these things that have occurred in the history of the world. They are present therefore in the collective memory, even though deeply buried. The more violent the experiences have been the more carefully they are hidden away from present consciousness. We all partake of this race memory, this mass consciousness, besides those levels which are of a more directly personal nature. There is, however, a common denominator here in the external sense with respect to all human beings on the face of the earth — a memory reaching back to an experience of immense horror.

It is interesting to note that whenever the idea of disruption on a large scale with respect to the earth's surface is suggested a mass hysteria very quickly begins to develop. People tend to react on the basis of superstition, but where does the superstition come from? In such case there is a touching of this deeply buried memory and people begin to feel fearful and desperate. A small point of this enormous fear pushes upward to the level of consciousness and human beings are reminded of they know not what. The spirit of the experience comes slightly again into the awareness without any particular memory of the body of it, but it is enough to stir emotions very rapidly. It may be said, quite irrational emotions, but the fact of the matter is that it isn't entirely irrational, because it is based in actual experience, not of the individuals concerned but of the human race as such. So we have these occasions when the hidden memory is reactivated to a small degree. It comes to the surface and it makes people do very peculiar things, because they are afraid. Fear is the controlling force in human lives everywhere, fear which is fundamentally a faith in the working of the Law.

Dr. Velikovsky has written of these things in his books, speaking of a collective amnesia regarding the violent events that have occurred on earth in relatively quite recent history. These things are not so very far away in actual fact. You will note that the theories that man has developed have all attempted to postulate immense periods of time, not only immense periods of time but a very gradual and peaceful unfoldment of events. Evidences of all kinds have been sought which would support these ideas so as to helpfully cover up the actual memory of something quite different. On this basis we may be caused to feel that our behavior is quite all right and that we need not anticipate anything very troublesome insofar as planetary events are concerned. Here again we see the methods that have been used to cover up this very painful and disturbing memory. The god of science has been invoked to assist in this rationalization.

One of the reasons for the very violent reaction to Dr. Velikovsky's works is again based in the triggering of the memory which nobody wants to look at. Looking at that reaction, we could say there was something quite irrational emanating from supposedly very rational people. Yes, it seemed to be very irrational, and yet in a sense it was rational too, because it was consequent upon this buried memory, something that is actually there, something which is not merely imaginary. So for the sons and the daughters, the subsequent generations, of those who actually experienced these events there is, in all, this fundamental basic fear. According to the psychological approach, if there is something of this nature in the subconscious levels of mind then we need to let it be brought to the surface so that it may be examined and seen for what it is, in order for it to be relinquished. But this doesn't really get the job done, because it is still merely dealing with effects. The fundamental trouble is not so much with the effects as with the original cause of those effects; so we have something doubly buried here. First of all the violent effects have been buried as a memory, but underneath those violent effects is buried still deeper a consciousness of the original failure on the part of man when he betrayed the Lord.

Man, in oneness with God, accepted the trust of the Lord. He held the creative purposes of God in trust for the Lord on earth. He betrayed that trust. Human beings tend to look with horror upon the action of Judas in betraying the Lord on earth nineteen centuries ago. All that Judas did was to reenact what was true, and has been true ever since, of mankind as a whole. This betrayal has been portrayed in various ways in the scriptures of the world, including of course the Bible. You may remember the story of Cain and Abel, for instance. Cain has represented mankind. The Lord was betrayed. This awful sense of guilt is buried below the sense of horror with respect to the physical events which were the result of man's guiltiness. Merely to bring out the events and say, “All we have to do is to look at these events to get rid of our fears,” is nonsense. It can't be done that way, because while the events themselves emphasized the fears, they did not originate the fears. Man betrayed the Lord. In the initial stages he thought he was getting away with it, but then the axe fell and he was brought face to face with an awareness of the enormity of his action.

Man, carrying God's trust, extending dominion on earth, had a responsibility which not only related to this planet as such but to the whole solar system. This is one reason why in the myths that have come down to us there is a relatedness between the names of the planets and the gods who are directly concerned with function on earth. The control, the dominion, of God extending through man on earth in relationship to what was being done on earth included the control and dominion which was operating in the whole solar system. This is why man's betrayal of God had such devastating effects beyond the confines of this planet. When man began to see what was happening, having previously imagined that he was getting away with something, it finally dawned upon him with awful certainty what the results of his action actually were. Now here is the guilt, and here is the consequent fear.

Over the ages there has been a constant endeavor to cover up, to hide it away; it was far too much to be faced. Basically there has been no willingness yet to acknowledge the failure. Oh how man has endeavored all down through the ages, to this very hour, to explain away his own sense of guilt, a very valid sense of guilt. From the psychiatric standpoint, usually the endeavor is to persuade the individual that he doesn't need to feel guilty anymore, but that is self-delusion; if he is guilty he should feel that way. The point is that he may do what is necessary to reverse the prior experience which brought the sense of guilt. He has been ransomed in this sense. It is quite possible to let the state of affairs change. He had been ransomed long before our Master Himself came on earth; the provision had always been there; but it was made so vividly evident through our Master when He was on earth that all have been left without excuse subsequently.

Our Master Himself revealed that, regardless of the fact that He was betrayed and suffered the consequences of that betrayal, the reality, the truth of Being, survived on earth. He revealed in Himself that the provision was and is present with the children of men to let that same experience be known. He opened the door; He cleared the way; He made it absolutely obvious, although human beings since that day have done their level best to hide the obvious, to maintain the self-righteousness which has been developed to cover up the sense of guilt. But now events in the world are moving with such awful certainty that people everywhere are finding it a little difficult to maintain the fiction, and the memory of past events begins to surface. Because of the fear based in guilt people become desperate.

We see all these things occurring, but to the extent that we ourselves have acknowledged the failure, have admitted that we have shared in the betrayal, and have been willing to come again before the Lord without a vestige of excuse, then it is found that the opportunity for salvation is still here. Not only must the fact of the appalling results of man's action be recalled, acknowledged as being just — but beyond that again, the action which produced those results, the real culprit, must be acknowledged. Each one of us can say, in approaching the Lord, “I betrayed You, Lord.” It is because of that betrayal that there is fear. “Perfect love casts out fear.” Only when we can come to the point of saying, “I love You, Lord,” may the fear vanish away, the cause of disaster be dissolved, and the cause of creativeness restored to the experience of man.

Man's despicable arrogance is a surface manifestation, obvious enough in the eyes of God, of his sickening fear. There is only one way of salvation and that is, when the Lord God comes walking in the Garden in the cool of the day, for man to step forth from behind the trees which have hidden him to himself and acknowledge his guilt: “I am responsible” — not just “We are responsible.” That may be true but it means nothing until the individual says, “I am responsible. I betrayed You, Lord. My action crucified You, Lord, on earth. My action is responsible for the ill results of human experience, for the state of the world, for the devastation of Your Garden. I am responsible.” It is more difficult to make that admission genuinely today than it really would have been on that first occasion, but the requirement is no different. The Law hasn't changed one iota.  Difficult or not, this is the requirement, obviously so when we honestly look at it. The imputation has ever been that the fault has lain at God's door for creating things the way He did. He has even been described by some benighted souls as being a monster worse than any human being who ever lived, for producing this state of affairs.

Who has what it takes to say, “I am responsible,” and mean it? If it is just words, that means nothing; but to see the responsibility, to accept it, to step out from behind the trees and to answer the Lord, reveals the beginnings of restored manhood or womanhood. How many are so willing? How many would be inclined to say, “Oh no, I couldn't do that! I have got to maintain my own little sphere of separateness. I like this. I want to keep it for a while. I want to have my own way.  I want to continue betraying the Lord.” There is no excuse anymore, and the axe falls. The final falling of the axe is the falling of the ultimate curtain on a tragic drama concluded — the tragedy of guilty man.

Where there is something held in the subconscious mind there is a tendency to be impelled by that something to re-experience the event — a fatal fascination. While everybody claims to object to the direction in which the world is going, everybody behaves in a way that ensures that it will continue to go in that direction — evidence of man's stolid progress toward nuclear annihilation. If comets and planets won't cooperate in bringing a cataclysm on the surface of the earth, then man's going to do it for himself. Here is this fatal compulsion. People have become so accustomed to the idea that nuclear war is an impossibility that they overlook the fact that it is actually a certainty as long as they are governed by fear. What was it that Job said? “For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.” The Law works.

Of course there is an easy solution here: Stop fearing, stop being afraid! But how? “I love You, Lord!” That simple way — I love You, Lord!” There is no other way given by God to the children of men. “I have betrayed You, Lord. Forgive me! I love You!” There it is. Too simple, too straightforward, to devious human beings. If it is, how sad! “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem ... your house is left unto you desolate,” until there are those who are willing to acknowledge the truth and to say, “I love You, Lord! I love the truth. I love the beauty of Your Being. I love the Design of Life which is Yours and Yours alone. I love to give individual form in expression on earth to what You are. In doing so, I am what You are. I love You, Lord!”

© Emissaries of Divine Light