Your First Love

Your  First  Love

Martin Cecil   November 27, 1977

The first message to the seven churches contained in the Book of Revelation, the blueprint of the Third Sacred School, was to the church of Ephesus, and it reads as follows:

“Unto the angel of the church of Ephesus write; These things saith he that holdeth the seven stars in his right hand, who walketh in the midst of the seven golden candlesticks;

“I know thy works, and thy labour, and thy patience, and how thou canst not bear them which are evil: and thou hast tried them which say they are apostles, and are not, and hast found them liars:

“And hast borne, and hast patience, and for my name's sake hast laboured, and hast not fainted.

“Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.

"Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.

"But this thou hast, that thou hatest the deeds of the Nicolaitanes, which I also hate.

“He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the tree of life, which is in the midst of the paradise of God.”

Here is a rebuke being offered to a certain aspect of consciousness present in human beings. We see this particularly as it relates to those who are allowing the form of the Archangel to manifest on earth. Here is the first area of rebuke within the scope of the consciousness of mankind. The rebuke is offered into the consciousness of those who have the responsibility of giving form to the body of the Archangel. And this is the first rebuke, the first requirement, if anything else of value is to follow subsequently.

“These things saith he that holdeth the seven stars in his right hand, who walketh in the midst of the seven golden candlesticks.”

Here is pictured the Archangel who has the control of all levels of consciousness in His manifest Body. There only is a manifest Body to the extent that this fact of control is made evident. That control is extended through the seven stars, specifically relating to the angels who compose His Body on earth, and through those angels all levels of consciousness are encompassed. So here is a message extended into the developing consciousness of the Body of the Spirit of Truth, the Body of the Archangel, and it is the first one. Unless heed is paid to this message the other messages are of little consequence.

We have noted the fact that the Archangel is keenly aware of what those who compose His Body, His developing Body, are up to. I think sometimes the Spirit of Truth is thought of as being apart somehow, maybe carrying a watching brief, but not actually on hand. The statement was made that he is with you and shall be in you. This "shall be in you" aspect of the matter is what allows the control of the Archangel to operate through the consciousness of His Body on earth. If there is a recognition that the angel who you are is already present and walking in the midst of your consciousness, offering control, exactly the same thing is true with respect to the Archangel and His collective Body.

We may sometimes think to hide from the presence of the Lord. This is what Adam and Eve did in the beginning. They hid themselves from the Lord, but all they actually did was to hide the Lord from themselves—they had not really hidden themselves from the Lord. The same is true with respect to all of us. We're not hidden at all. We hear of the ostrich who is supposed to bury his head in the sand thereby imagining that he is out of sight. Well he is out of his own sight but plainly visible to everybody else; and this is indeed a good portrayal of the human state, supposedly hidden from the Lord but in plain view in actual fact. It's wise to remember this. You are exposed, so don't fool yourself. Recognize the fact. Acknowledge it. If you have not known the Lord it is not because He has not known you.

So your wonderful works have been in plain view. The Lord knows all about that. He is not neglectful of your willingness to serve at certain levels of consciousness. He sees how dedicated you have been, how determined in your own several ways to do what you thought was the right thing and to see clearly enough the sinners around you. All this is acknowledged as being so. The Lord is not neglecting your good works. But in spite of all that has been done, in spite of your labor, there has been something missing, something which had not been completely remembered: “Thou hast left thy first love.”

Obviously, in dealing with the various levels of consciousness that are included in these messages to the churches we find differences in individual people. Some may require more rebuke in certain aspects of consciousness. Some of the churches here mentioned indicate where the rebuke is required, but we are dealing with this first one. It is true that the rebuke is necessary in this first one to varying degrees insofar as individuals are concerned. Those are the ones you need to see and to hear. So if we are considering a certain level of consciousness, here designated as the church of Ephesus, there will be a variation with respect to all of you in this connection.

I have been giving emphasis to your first love. What is it? The Word. This is your first love. I am sure that many of you can recall the delight when you first had opportunity to begin to consider the literature of this ministry. If there was a real openness of response in you, you couldn't have enough of it. I recall from my own experience, shortly after I came on Uranda's mailing list in 1939, that early in 1940 he sent me considerable stacks of mailings. They were like this (indicated how thick), a number of bundles. And I devoured that material, hardly stopping for meals or for sleep. It so happened at the time that I had opportunity to do so. In this way I became aware of my love for the Word, and I am sure that many of you have had a similar experience. You may not have been snowed under with such a massive initial dose, but it has been consistently coming. By and large this has been received with joy. Here is the first love—love for the Word.

You will note that the word Word has only one letter different to the word Lord. You will also note that the Word was spoken of as being in the beginning with God. One might say in one sense that the words Word and Lord are interchangeable: “In the beginning was the Lord, and the Lord was with God, and the Lord was God,” or “In the beginning was the Word.” “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart. Thou shalt love the Word thy God with all thy heart.” Here is something very definite and very specific.

Of course we can't love on command. It is not a matter of trying to love—that is futile. It is simply a matter of awakening to the love which is already known in angelic consciousness. We don't have to generate love or make it appear, do anything to cause it to happen; it is already there waiting to be experienced. Lots of human beings make claims about love, loving God perhaps or loving some other person, but the truth of love is an already-existing reality. Human beings may awaken to it, and when they do they begin to experience it and then they know it. So if there is a commandment to love the Lord thy God, or the Word, it is not such an unreasonable instruction as it has tended to seem to many people. You cannot love on command. The suggestion is then probably made: “Well you have to think of all the wonderful things that God does, and then you'll discover how really lovable He is.” But in spite of all this most people have been afraid of God, and fear and love don't go very well together. In fact it is said that perfect love casts out fear, so they don't inhabit the same place.

There is indication that it is wise to fear God, according to various statements made in the Old Testament, but the word fear did not indicate that one should be terrified of God; it merely indicated that one should have natural respect and awe toward God. All this is naturally so when it is experienced because we awaken to it. And you do not awaken to it by saying, “Well I know I should keep that first great commandment; I'll see what I can do about it”; because there is the devil speaking, who in fact has no interest whatsoever in loving God. Why not? Because he is totally preoccupied with loving himself. That is the human ego.

If you instruct the human ego to love God he may put on a nice face but he will never do it. There may be a pretense, there may be claims of the lips, there may be what is called belief; but the reality of love is never known by the human ego. Love is known by the angel. Sometimes a little of that angelic consciousness filters through into the experience of earthly consciousness and the individual touches love. But on this basis human beings don't know what the truth of it is, and it wreaks havoc in human lives. It becomes in human experience hellfire. Though there are wonderful anticipations they remain largely mirages.

So we have a point of orientation here—our first love, the love of the Word. Without this first what else is there? We can never know the Spirit of Truth without the Word, and if we do not love the Word we could never experience oneness with the Spirit of Truth. All too many within our ministry have tended to become neglectful of the Word. There are many who have not, also. But sometimes those who carry the real responsibility have tended to be neglectful of the Word, and so a message comes from the Archangel to rebuke that neglect, to repent and remember from whence thou art fallen.

This brings into focus again the vital nature of the Word. It is a key to what we call the restoration, because it is the key to the incarnation of the Archangel on earth in physical form—and only as the Spirit of Truth has come in this way is it possible for reproof to be extended to the world. The words that are expressed in the current of the Spirit of Truth are priceless beyond the imaginings of men, not merely for the words themselves but for the Word which is thereby made available.

Each angel is charged with the responsibility on earth for speaking the Word; and, using the term speaking, this is more inclusive than what a person may say vocally. It includes the whole of life, everything that emerges because you as a person are on earth. The base of that should be the Word, so that all expression is harmonious to the Word, is an extension of the Word, uncolored, undistorted, unchanged, but taking unique form through each one, and having taken that form, blending naturally and easily with what has taken form through everyone else. In that blending together the light shines. We know that in the Word is life, and the way we know the Word is through living, by reason of the fact that the available Word which we love above all else finds complete expression in our momentary living.

In order that this may occur many words have been spoken. There's a book full of them here—the Bible. There are many words spoken since the inception of this ministry carrying the tone of the Word. It is impossible to reach that tone of the Word except by reason of the words. You cannot skip over the words and find the tone, all on your isolated own. Human beings have been trying to do this ever since the fall, and never has anyone at any time succeeded. Why indulge further in such futility when the provision is so accurately and so specifically and so generously made?

We may see here something portrayed by the way in which one reads a service—trying to interpret mentally speaking, as though here was another spiritual course of some kind which one can study and become wiser. It isn't that, it never has been that, although quite a few people have tried to make it that. The words as they are spoken, and as they are recorded and made available, give opportunity for a person to learn to move with the same current of the spirit in which the words were spoken; and he will certainly not discover what that is if he is studying the words, trying to figure out what the words mean—trying to interpret them, in other words. He must move with the current of the spirit, the spirit which made possible the expression of those words in the first place. That is the important thing. The words are the connecting link with that spirit; therefore one must flow with what it is that is available through the words, not stopping every now and again and saying, “Well now what does that mean? I had better get this clear in my consciousness before I go on.” Here is a human ego trying to inflate itself. The words are not food for the human ego, and if the human ego tries to eat them as food it will likely get sore indigestion. It is a matter of letting those words move freely through one's consciousness so that there may be a flow of the spirit. When there is a flow of the spirit in this fashion one becomes aware of the flow of the spirit and, while the words certainly have their importance, it is the flow of the spirit that is vital, for here is the Spirit of Truth with which one is beginning to align oneself. So there is a need to read the words intelligently, not seeking to make them fit into one's own structures of consciousness, because they don't, but yielding one's structures of consciousness in favor of an easy movement with the flowing water of truth.

Obviously it is not just a matter of reading the words to oneself. If there is association with the spirit in which the words were first spoken then one is obviously not getting anything for oneself. Do you think that while I am speaking now I am speaking because I want to get something for myself? You know that isn't true. I am expressing something in which you may share. So if you are associated with that spirit, you are expressing something to share with others, even when you are seemingly merely reading it to yourself. In other words this is an attitude which begins to emerge as you move with the spirit in which the words were first spoken. It is something flowing out from you. If it isn't flowing out from you but is merely something you are trying to get into yourself you cannot possibly know the Spirit of Truth, because the Spirit of Truth is outflowing.

You understand, don't you? You know something of what I am talking about. As you associate yourself with these words you begin to familiarize yourself with the Spirit of Truth, with the Word, and this is the way provided by the LORD so that it might happen. It is not going to happen by human beings following out their old mental routines. So the evidence of the Spirit of Truth must be received if the Spirit of Truth is to be known, and that evidence is in the words. We might move on from reading to oneself, now having an awareness that it isn't really reading to oneself—it is reading to everybody else, whether there is anyone present with you and you are reading out loud to them or not—but there may be more than silent participation in the creative process. The words which give evidence of the Spirit of Truth in action may be read and shared with others.

Until a person has learned to let it flow he doesn't understand, although he may think he does because he has made some fancy interpretation. People fall in love with their interpretations, and by doing that they lose their first love. They fall in love with their own creations, and those creations are phony; they are the enchantments of the black magicians. So there is a need to develop such proficiency if it is lacking. But the mere ability to read proficiently is certainly not enough—proficient reading is very often quite empty. With respect to this matter of reading and proficiency certain ideas have been developed regarding technique, so that one could give the appearance of saying something really important and weighty without actually doing so! To the Egyptians, what Pharaoh's magicians do looks very much the same as what the expression of the Spirit of Truth does, but in fact there is a vast difference, and anyone with ears to hear knows the difference. The point is, however, that in our opportunities to read services out loud we have special provision by which we may learn to move even more easily in the current of the Spirit of Truth.

When you read a service those words are your spontaneous words of the moment, and it should not be possible for someone with their eyes closed to tell whether you are speaking spontaneously or reading. When this is true of you then I would acknowledge that you have the capacity to move fairly accurately in the current of the Spirit of Truth—but you had to discover how to do it. It didn't happen to you just by magic. If you have reading limitations in this regard then you have limitations in your own supposedly spontaneous expression based in the movement of the current of the Spirit of Truth. You may assume that it is an expression of the truth but it will not be. You have to pass your examination, in other words. You have to see the importance of that examination, and you will do that just to the extent that you are keeping the First Great Commandment. When you love the Word it is always a delight to participate in the expression of it. When you love the Word you just can't wait.

In days past, in the beginnings of the Unit here at 100 Mile House, everybody was very busy. There were only very few participants in that emerging Unit and we all had a lot to do. I certainly had a lot to do I know, but when the mailing arrived, I don't care what I was doing, I sat down and opened the envelope and read the mailing, because here was the Word. There was nothing more important to me, not because I was trying to get something out of it but because I was sharing something. That was my first love. They were Uranda's words in those days—now they are my words mostly. Of course I have to read through the transcripts of my services to make sure that they make sense when they are written. There is a difference between speaking and writing. So there are corrections to be made, and I have to read the transcripts for that reason. Then a little later they come again as mailings, and when they come again as mailings I read them through again! You might say, well, I should know what they say. You'd be surprised! I certainly don't memorize what I say.

When I was giving a public lecture in New York one time people kept arriving late. Long after we had started they still kept coming in and coming in, standing around the walls. About five minutes before I concluded the lecture a lady came in and listened, and when I finished and was preparing to depart she came up to me and said, “Will you please give me a brief thumbnail sketch of what it was you said.” Well if I could do that I would have given the brief thumbnail sketch for the lecture. It would have saved a lot of time! What ridiculous notions people have. They have no idea what is going on.

Thou shalt love the Lord thy God. Thou shalt love the Word. Here is the first love, and when we begin to awaken to this love we find that indeed it is true that we are given to eat of the Tree of Life, which is in the midst of the Paradise of God, right here where we are. That is the experience. It is all outlined rather accurately here in Revelation, although in somewhat obscure language. We know these things by experience, and if this is the first love, if this is the first essential, then other people need to know it too. If there is no evidence that we are true to our first love then why should anyone else pay any attention?

I thank God that there are those who have allowed something to occur within themselves so that when they first receive some literature it immediately awakens their awareness of their first love. And I thank God for that. But are we not charged with that responsibility ourselves, really, to be the Living Word? And how can we be the Living Word without first loving the words which make that consciousness of the Living Word known to us? So I thank God for the opportunity of speaking of these things this evening, even though we seem to have gone over our time a little, because it is such a vital area in our service and in our living. Glory to God, because we love the Word.

© emissaries of divine light